Hi there,
This is the unusual week often termed “Crimbo Limbo”. That week between Christmas and New Year where time seems to be a little different. Whether you celebrate the festivities or not, this week is a strange one. But to keep a little normality (and in an attempt to build a better writing habit) I am going to share with you my personal story. I have written about it elsewhere but this is more personal because I am writing it for you personally. I also offer a quote to reflect on and offer 4 powerful questions which can be used to overcome a challenge, either in your personal or work life.
Quote of the Week
This week I want to share a quote from the Dalai Lama:
"Choose to be optimistic, it feels better."
Dalai Lama
Short but profound and it is something which really resonates with me. I have known many people who are not optimistic, and there are times when I haven’t been but if given the choice, I would choose optimism every time.
Burnout
Earlier this week I realised that for the first time in a long time, I was actually present for Christmas. You see, 18 months ago I reached a dark and scary place.
It took a near breakdown and total burnout for me to leave Children’s Social Work. I loved being a children's social worker but it would have killed me. There is something unique about Social Work, not just children’s social work but all types of practice. Social Workers get to be part of some of the most hidden areas of people's lives. We sit and talk about trauma, pain, and emotional hurt on a daily basis. But then we can help shape the future of people’s lives through using expertly honed communication skills.
I decided to forge a path as a Children’s Social Worker but I know colleagues across all service areas will find some of the reflections in my upcoming words really resonate with them and their own experience.
If you would have said to me 2 years ago that I was going to leave children’s social work, I would have laughed saying that I could never imagine ever leaving this job. However, it is only now, after leaving, that I am beginning to realise that I was a shell of a person. I made the decision to leave while trying to manage several crisis situations at once. It was hard because I was emotionally invested in trying to make things better for the families I worked with.
Now, I need to be clear, while I gave 100% to my job I thought I had good boundaries. I wouldn’t routinely work at weekends or stay up late finishing the admin side of the work. I reserved working over my contracted hours for pure crisis work. But just like diabetes creeps upon the person whose diet isn’t great and doesn’t get active enough, burnout creeped upon me. Before I knew it, I wasn’t sleeping and it was taking me 5 days of my leave to unwind from the stress of work (actually, reflecting now I don’t think I ever truly relaxed). Constantly worrying about whether the crisis I had left was going to be managed in my absence.
I gave everything to my work at the detriment of my life and it still didn’t feel good enough. There was always more I “should” be doing. An audit which picked holes in my practice. It’s funny, individual cases were audited but nobody ever did a whole caseload audit. Privately, I suspect it is because this would just shine a light into the shadows of modern day practice where it is expected we work above our capacity all the time.
Will I return to children’s practice??? I’m not sure.
I miss the direct work. The ability to create a space for families who feel nobody “gets” them and empower them to see a better future. But I don’t miss the lack of recognition of professional capacity for each new crisis.
The system is broken, always needing to respond to crises as a result of failed public policy, recruitment challenges and total collapse of supportive networks in societies. The demand is 100% but 100% of professional capacity only meets 80% of need which leaves 20% without. I used to lay awake worrying about the 20% of people who were left without the support they needed. Always having to prioritise the urgent life and death scenarios was taking its toll on me.
That coupled with workplaces that don’t prioritise real professional development and skill development outside of the “corporate direction” of the given administration leaves practitioners feeling under-valued and frankly, used. It’s no wonder so many turn to agency social work. Agency social work has its stresses (I have been an agency worker myself) but at least you feel compensated for the stress you are exposed to each week. Also, there is no incentive for “great training opportunities” because everyone is over capacity leaving no emotional space for professional growth.
In contrast, I now work for an organisation that places boundaries on expectations. That encourages professional growth. It does this against the same financial backdrop as my previous employers but makes it clear, the workforce is its greatest asset. It invests in its people. And this is the irony, the things that I love about my new role are not exclusive to my employer. They are things which can be replicated in any workplace. The way my manager acknowledges how busy I am and protects the team. How we are given space to reflect. We come together and have a common ambition for the work we do and we talk about it. It isn’t presumed. Everyone is part of a bigger picture and we talk about it. There are collective discussions about how to make our little team and system work better for the clients.
If you are broken by work, remember this, there are other opportunities available. You do not have to stay in a role which is sucking energy from other areas of your life. You are worth more than that.
4 Powerful Questions
If you are new to this newsletter, this is the part where I offer 4 powerful questions designed to help you work through a particular issue you are facing in your personal or work life.
What do you want to change the most?
This question helps focus your reflections and thoughts on a particular issue or challenge. It brings your attention to what is most on your mind.
What have you tried to do to fix it?
This question enables you to review attempts already made to make changes to the issue you want to change. It provides a map of a journey already travelled and helps you to see the things that have worked, and not worked.
Who do you need support from to achieve your goal?
In life, we very rarely have to do things alone. Yes, we are the person who has to take action but by thinking about who else can support you, you become part of a community. You realise that you are not on your own.
How will you know you have reached your goal?
This helps you know what to look for with what you are trying to achieve. You have that personal indicator of success. By writing it down, when you review your progress you have the ability to reflect on whether you have moved closer to your goal.
I use questions like this all the time. Both personally and when I have coached people to overcome their personal challenges. They are so powerful and form a framework to create change which, if used, can be transformative.
Plans for next year
As we come to the end of the newsletter, I want to thank you for subscribing. It still amazes me that you have signed up and I am truly grateful to you for doing so. Sharing my thoughts and opinions on how we can create longevity in our life and careers is just one step to helping people feel happy in the work they choose to do.
Next year, I am thinking about holding monthly sessions for people to come together and reflect with peers around specific practice issues. And I am also working on creating a workshop for people who are experiencing burnout in Social Work (whether as a Social Worker or any one of the other inspiring and amazing roles associated with helping vulnerable people). Both of these would could towards CPD and if attendees would receive a certificate detailing the time spent in the sessions.
If you would like to be part of the initial groups to get this started, please do get in touch. Either by leaving me a comment below, replying to this email or reaching out on Twitter.
That has come to the end of this edition. I hope that whatever you choose to do for the end of year celebrations, that you find joy. I would just like to say, thank you for choosing to do what you do. And if nobody else has told you recently, you really are amazing.
Much Love,
Anthony
Hiya,
Sign me up for your workshops and sessions around burnout. I have in my career experienced burnout and it is only now I am out of it that I can honestly say I have learnt to work differently. Happy to share any knowledge that may help others.